A Few Faves

So, if you didn't know, Ben and I are now living in Ashton, Idaho (population 1,127, pets included, I'm pretty sure) while Ben goes to school at BYU-I in Rexburg. We want something closer to campus but, for the time being, our cozy cabin-esque house is doing just fine.

However, we don't have internet. So I've taken advantage of Ben having fewer classes on Thursdays and Fridays by coming to school with him. It's a plus in many ways including I get to spend more time with him and less time by my lonesome. AND I get to commandeer his school account and internet usage while he's in class.

As you can see, it's a win-win kind of situation.

Anyhow I figured I'd let you know about my all time favorite relationship building type books because I'm a nerd and I like to spread the love.




 This book is called "Why We Love" by Helen Fisher. This is more of an interesting read than a self help one. Fisher got a bunch of "in love" volunteers and was able to perform different brain scans to see what part of the brain lights up when you're in love, how long "romantic love" lasts and a couple of tips for maintaining that kind of love. It also explains what happens in the brain when you break up. It's super fascinating and will just make you think, "So that's why I do/have done that."


"This next book is "And They Were Not Ashamed" by Laura M. Brotherson. In case you can't figure out what this one is about, the subtitle is: Strengthening Marriage Through Sexual Fullfilment. I don't know about you guys, but I grew up in a house where you just didn't talk about sex. It was horribly taboo. This author does a really good job talking about sex tastefully. Brotherson is LDS so she does bring in biblical references as well as modern day revelation that support the sanctity of marriage and the expression of love within a marriage. She definitely brings out the spiritual side. I was really impressed with how much content she has in the book-none of which I found repetitive. She uses really clear examples and illustrations. I personally think this book is a "must own" and not just a "must read." She goes beyond sex and talks about a bunch of other aspects related to strengthening your marriage. Toward the end she actually talks about how it's important to help your children learn about sex from a young age. For parents who aren't quite sure how to teach this to their kids, she actually gives a sort of lesson plan with specific things to say or questions to ask for various age groups. It's really an awesome book. And I think it's a great opportunity for couples to be a little more open about their sexual relationship. Another book along these lines is "The Act of Marriage" by Tim LaHaye. He's Christian (not sure what denomination) so he also brings in biblical references. I personally liked "And They Were Not Ashamed" better just because LaHaye seemed fairly outdated (and maybe that's only because the copy I had was published in like the 70s). Anyhow, either of these books are really great for guys to read, just because they help guys kind of see the girl's point of view.

Sorry that was a really long explanation. The next book is "The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands" by Dr. Laura Schlessinger. First I have to say that my mom was a huge Dr. Laura fan (you know, before she got kicked off the air) and I absolutely hated her (Dr. Laura. Not my mom). I think she's so mean to all of her callers. It drives me crazy. So when Ben suggested I read this book, I kind of ignored him. But one day I got really bored so I opened it and I was floored. This woman gets women. And men. I mean, as I read, I realized that a lot of the things she accused women of doing, I did! I never thought I was a terrible wife, but when I read this book I realized there were so many things I could do better at. The book really helped me to understand the simplicity of men and what their needs are. I really felt inspired to be a better wife. Dr. Laura is to the point and she has really awesome experiences to share. My complaints were that she gets a little repetitive and she refers to guys as "your man" too many times and it got on my nerves (but that's my own personal problem, right?).

I'm not sure if this is available as a book. I've only seen it on CD or kindle. It's called "For All Eternity" by Dr. John L. Lund. If you ignore all the other books I've listed DO NOT IGNORE THIS ONE. It is honestly, one of the best resources out there for married couples. I'm not kidding you. My parents encouraged me to listen to this like 3 years ago. I loved it so much that I went out and bought it cause I was like, "Someday I want a kick A marriage but it won't be kick A unless we listen to this baby every 18 months." Dr. Lund has practiced marriage and family therapy for years. The CD is actually a recording of a 4 part marriage strengthening workshop he taught. It's cool because you can listen to it in parts and he gives you specific things to work on in between each session. He is absolutely hilarious and all his examples are so real. His wife helps him with parts of it. One of my favorite things is that he give some awesome tips on communicating in marriage. Oh my gosh I seriously love this so much! You should go out and buy it now. Or let me know and I will let you borrow my copy. Heck, I'll even buy it for you. That's how much I love it and think everyone should listen to it.

So those are my suggestions for awesome books to read. Even if you aren't dating anyone, you should get a head start on some of these.